How Do Children Understand and Cope with Grief? with Jessica Correnti

SHOW NOTES: Episode 26

How do children understand and cope with grief? I have brought on a children’s grief expert and Child Life Specialist, Jessica Correnti, to share her experiences and insights on helping children cope with grief. This was part of a guest expert interview that is part of the Pregnancy Loss Practitioner Program. Jessica's insights into the world of grief, particularly as it pertains to children, were both enlightening and deeply moving. 

Jessica has been a certified child life specialist for 15 years, helping children navigate through difficult life experiences. Her work has taken her to various hospital settings, including pediatric intensive care units, where she has witnessed a lot of grief and loss. However, her journey into the world of grief became personal when she experienced six pregnancy losses, including losing her daughter at 22 weeks.

In addition to her work as a child life specialist, Jessica is also an author of several children's books, one of which focuses on supporting bereaved siblings. She works with families virtually from around the world and offers in-person sessions for local families, helping children of all ages process their grief. Her own grief experiences have fueled her desire to help other families going through similar situations.

She discusses the importance of acknowledging and addressing the change in families after a loss, and explains more about the misconceptions that children are too young to understand grief. She emphasizes the need for open communication and highlights the role of play in processing emotions. She shares that you should use clear, concrete language when explaining death to children and address misconceptions and fears to prevent children from forming their own conclusions. 

Jessica explained that children grieve in small, bite-sized pieces compared to adults. They may ask a few questions related to the loss and then go back to playing or being silly. This doesn't mean they didn't understand, but rather that they can only handle a certain amount of information at a time. Sometimes, children need repetition before fully comprehending and processing the loss. They may exhibit behavioral responses such as irritability, anger, meltdowns, or tantrums, as they may not be able to verbalize or name their feelings.

Jessica highlighted the role of play in helping children process and learn about death. Play is a natural way for children to explore and make sense of their world, and it can provide comfort, release, and an opportunity to process their emotions. She encourages parents and caregivers to follow the child's lead in play and not be alarmed if they play out themes related to death.

Jessica emphasized the importance of addressing children's questions and misconceptions about death. She advises against relying on euphemisms for death, such as saying someone has "gone to heaven" or "passed away." While these euphemisms may have their place in certain contexts, Jessica advises using clear and concrete language like "they're not with us anymore" to avoid misconceptions.

She also highlighted the importance of providing accurate information to children about the cause of death, such as a sick heart or brain, rather than simply saying they were "too sick." This helps prevent children from developing fears or misconceptions about getting sick themselves.

Overall, my conversation with Jessica was a profound exploration of children's grief. As parents, caregivers, or anyone involved in a child's life, it's crucial to understand and respect their unique grieving process.

I would love to hear what you thought of today’s episode on Instagram: @instituteofhealing_pl. Screenshot the episode, share it there, and tag me or send me a DM and let’s chat more about today’s episode! Much love to you all.

If you want to know more about how you can be the support for others or get support yourself after a loss, fill out the application form for the Pregnancy Loss Practitioner Certification.

IN THIS EPISODE, WE COVERED:

  • Jessica's background and experience as a certified child life specialist

  • Jessica's personal experience with pregnancy loss and her motivation to help other families

  • Myths surrounding children's grief and debunking them

  • How children process grief differently from adults

  • Children's grief in small, bite-sized pieces and behavioral responses\

  • Addressing children's questions and misconceptions about death

  • The role of play in helping children process and learn about death

  • Using clear and concrete language and addressing common misconceptions about death.

LINKS AND RESOURCES MENTIONED IN TODAY’S EPISODE:

MORE ABOUT THE WHAT I WISH I KNEW AFTER PREGNANCY LOSS PODCAST:

Welcome to the What I Wish I Knew After Pregnancy Loss Podcast! On this podcast, you will find support and encouragement for pregnancy loss at all stages, whether you were early in your pregnancy or experienced a stillbirth. 

You are safe, seen, and deeply understood here.

Hi, I’m Sharna, I am a loss mum myself and a mum to a beautiful rainbow baby. I am a projector in human design which means I am here to guide you to a new way of being, thinking, or healing. I know what it is like to personally live through the soul shattering experience of pregnancy loss. Out of my healing, I became a Trauma Informed Coach, Self-healing spiral practitioner and a womb light practitioner. I knew that my experience wasn’t the end of my story and I am here to show you that it isn’t the end of yours. You don’t have to ever find meaning in your loss but there is meaning in your life after loss & you deserve to heal.

On this podcast, you will find what I wish I knew before my pregnancy loss, guest experts expanding on important topics, and overall valuable information about pregnancy loss and healing and recovery after.

I would love to connect further with you on my Instagram: @instituteofhealing_pl or @sharnasouthan and you can also find out more information about The Pregnancy Loss Practitioner Certification here: https://www.sharnasouthan.com/healing-through-loss-blueprint.

This podcast is not intended for medical advice. Please seek medical advice from your physician.

PodcastSharna Southan